Life Less Than Ordinary - explores the profound effects of alcohol, drugs and boredom

Somehow we’re all trapped and stuck for being that we are. We often times fight to change ourselves but ultimately all the effort has little effect. We could change what we do but we cannot change who we are. You struggle year after year but getting nowhere and wonder if anything will ever change and the unavoidable answer to this reality is that, life sucks. But we can’t give up just yet. We keep struggling to solve our problems, our dilemmas but somehow the forces that created me random or otherwise has already spoken and determines that my life sucks!

I don’t know how common this is but somehow I feel so disconnected from everyone and everything. I am psychologically fucked up but maybe given the right drugs and therapy it will change in a major ways. I could feel good, relaxed, comfortable and I can feel happiness, excitement and I can experience my life as a great meaningful adventure. I can feel that all my troubles have been washed away. Like any other well-balanced person! Who am I kidding!

I tried gorging on as many drugs as I can possibly put into my system with the thought that it will ease the pain but of course not to the point that you could OD. When you find the drug you like, doing it occasionally won’t be enough. You want to do it everyday, you want it all the time. But in the end, this also unleashed a whole host of problems and next thing you know your life is fucked up in every way imaginable. You got your original problem plus you are an alcoholic or a drug addict! Life’s little ironies; the only thing that makes you feel good is also the thing that will destroy your mind and body. You do it long enough, your life!

I think most of the mood altering drugs available are just masking the symptoms for some these disorders. Tranquilizer for anxiety, antidepressants for depressive disorders and so on. Because the reality is no one truely understand the human psyche.